Give me back my feelings.
Even if they were a pile of hurt with pain dripping down on its side and scattered fears near it.
I want it all back.
Its better to feel something than nothing at all.
Let me believe I am still alive.
Let me be certain or at least pretty sure enough.

~Possibility

So tell me when you hear my heart stop,
You’re the only who knows
Tell me when you hear my silence
There’s a possibility
I wouldn’t know

Tell me when my sigh is over
You’re the reason why I’m close
Tell me when you hear me falling
There's a possibility
It wouldn’t show

Possibility-lykke li

Tagged by Siras

Rules:
Once you've been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 25 random things, facts, habits or goals about you. At the end, choose 25 people to be tagged. If I tagged you, its because I want to know more about you.

I was tagged by siras :)

this is a tough one God twenty-five facts lets see if i can come up with em!


1.I need to multitask all the time to keep my mind at rest.I text,chat,watch movie,read,listen to songs,eat all at the same time.

2.I hate people who smell bad.

3.The first thing I notice about anyone is their shoes and feet.

4.I try to avoid eye contact while making conversations they make me uncomfortable.

5.I play with my hair while I am studying.

6.I hate summers and rains. Sometimes i like rain but depends on my mood.

7.I have got an eccentric choice of music from old indian songs to trance. I can like anything and nothing at the same time.

8.I love to talk to myself and for few moments I do before going to bed and go through the whole day in my head.

9.I don't like to spend apart from on shoes and books it gives me guilt pangs otherwise.

10.Coldplay-trouble and Snow Patrol-run have been my most most favourite songs.

11.Grey's anatomy is not a show it is life for me.

12.I like to be around people and listen to them,people-watching is my favorite pass-time.

13.I aint a sporty person.

14.My most favorite book is "million little pieces"

15.The movie I like the most is "The pianist"

16.More than anything I love getting handmade gifts and love giving em too.

17.I am scared of almost all kinds of rides rollercoasters etc are not my thing.

18.I don't really like icecreams.

19.I wish to learn few more languages in my life.

20.Paintings are good but I like to work in black and white. These two colors hold more meaning to me than any other color.

21.If I get a chance I would like to make a pyschiatric organisation for women,children and adolescents in my region.

22.I like the person I am with others but I wish I treated myself better.

23.I don't like to sleep it seems wastage of time to me.

24.I can choose to be very strong or extremely sensitive I change.

25.Lastly, I hate to talk about myself..this was hard tag:S

I also tag everyone who is there in my blogroll.

Award :)

It would be infact my first award :) thankyou so much Sunakshi
Thank whoever gave this to you
2. Copy award
3. Post it in your blog
4. Tell us 7 things that your readers don’t know
5. Link 7 new bloggers
6. Notify winners of the award with a comment on their blog
7. Most of all - Keep being awesome!

Seven things about me:
1.I love black and blue colour
2.I hate lizards
3.I am pathetic at singing and dancing
4.I am a perfectionist so i don't even try things which I might think i am not good at
5.I treat myself with chocolates when I am down :$
6.I love getting foot massages
7.I hate summers

I pass this award to
Raaji
Kadri Luik
Marina
The Ragpicker
siras
KAY
Ubaid Ullah Ahmed

Fades....

ice

Louder than you can hear
silence that haunts the soul
slaves of blackness that entwines minds
fine threads
fragile thoughts
icy presence
hard and dry
to the core
carved out of stone
wearing out
empty filled with hollow

glistening droplets

silhouettes made of smoke

Liar

words become meaningless once they remain unsaid

emotions change to scars

locked up hearts

blocked minds

hollow

.

.

.

.

Person I am

picture by:KAY

p.s I apologize for my blog being so dead. Blame the Prof exams.I'll be back by end of October.

disbelief

a
Time changes a lot of things in us. We learn to move ahead and adjust with everything around us and sometimes even start to like it for a change. Life gets busy you run with it to catch up and be numb by the speed of it.For a while the thought comes that maybe yes you are okay with this pace and you are finally being the part of the crowd but for some it isn't true there are constant fork in the road to remind you of what you really are and the chains of restrictions around.


Self-doubt is a killer thing it makes you push away sometimes the best opportunities and also take some wrong decisions.

Heart is meant to be made of stone and locked up until somebody tries to open it for you.
bleh..


Frou Frou- Flicks
And I'm motioning still they stand inside me
And moments until the one i leave

People concertina to my private magic lantern move for me
With the senses all inclusive
In the theatre of triggered memories

WrOnG...!

you..:)

follow..

What if I let you go...what will be left behind? I know the emptiness..so I just want to fill up the emptiness? will you follow me? will you?

Too many pieces to fix..

I wish i could be a cat :( :( mine rest and sleep all day!! I want that luxury too! this PROF is getting on my nerves :@

Have a safe journey my love!

:)

:)

I am here for my sanity

the moments in which the heart crumbles down

all the hope fades to black

you just want to curl up in a ball on cold floor and cry

just an assurance

or a word or two

tell you that you are not wrong

not always wrong

the heart stops to bleed when it is broken all the time

the mind loses its sanity when its always in a fight against itself

Wrong..tainted..defaulted..defected..hate

is there an end to hate?

Can anybody stop it?

Hold her and tell her to love?

Tell something good

Give something to hold on to

You are not wrong...You are not wrong...*echoes*

fantasy..

I need my sanity back..! if you could see through these clouds

I am here for my sanity..

I am here for my sanity..

I am here for my sanity..

million little droplets..million little pieces

hole to crawl into

soul to search

life to end

Blood all over

kutless- All Alone

@#!^%

I am tired. My mind is fucked up. I have so much to do. So much work pressure.I can't feel a thing.I hate myself. Ugly and fat.I hate rain. I don't want to move. I want to pray.I think I am a bitch.blah

let go

let it sail away in the waters of conscience

grip it back and lock it in the boxes of logic

turn back and walk away from the visions of illusion

step your feet onto the stairs of reality and move ahead

classroom thoughts!

back to books and hectic life of 49

♥ is happy :)

:)

today is the day a princess was born

who rules on our hearts

HAPPY BIRTHDAY my lil sis :)

you make my life all worthwhile

thanks for all the ways

intentional and unintentional

to make me crack up with laughter

hehehe

=)

fly

lets try and fly away from this place

we dont belong here

we dont belong here

let me take you where you have got wings

and a smile in your eyes

where you are YOU and nobody else

lets fly away

:)

No matter how hard we try

the shadows keep on haunting

sometimes its impossible to undo

You can patch up the broken parts and nobody seems to notice but only the person who have put it back-ninteen minutes

Some Postsecrets I liked

Protect

We all live our lives for others..for people who matter..for whom we exist..

No matter how hard it gets..how deep you fall in..and hit hard on the ground..there is a time for rising up..

No matter how much ignoring we do..there is a part of us who always knew the truth and makes us get up again..makes you want to survive for the people you love..part of you totally aware of all the loss and how much redemption to be done..

Its been too long now..I have scared you enough..hurt you enough..the time is coming for me to rise up and protect you now!..I will..<3

Shattered

To tell and make this easier for myself..or make it even more harder?

the little things that apparently may not even be visible

they are the crushed glass on which I walk everyday

like paper cuts..bruised..

it was a HARD sketch! God all the creases!

Myheart is playing tricks with me..creating an illusion for me..painting it in vivid colours...but I am not allowed..yes I am not..I wish somebody could take all this out of me and assort it all for me what to think what to do..hate it..

Together :)

life is ridiculous
it's really hot here
run run
firelight
vacations to come
tests

sigh...

she is smoke

words that don't carry any meaning
pain that has no end
life trickles down through her hands
every day is an old day just like before just like tomorrow like yesterday..
strings of heart twined well..tightened up where they were meant to be left loose
and these are just words
this is just a face made of flesh and bones
beneath the soul decays
decays and crumbles down everyday
fears take hold
change to shapes
dreams become nightmares
hopes fade away
ambitions fall behind
steps taken
moving ahead yet pulled behind
this is what meant to be...
she is a smoke left after the burning
she is the ashes after the fire

RESCUED-Jack mannequin
But when it's quiet
Does she hear me?
Jettisoned to the center of the storm
And I'm thinking
I'd prefer not to be rescued

And Oh, I can feel her
She's dying just to keep me cold
And I'm finally numb
So please don't get me rescued
Rescued

And it's unclear
But this may be my last I,
I can tell
She's raising hell
To give to me
She got me warm
So please don't get me rescued

And oh say you'll miss me
One last time
And I'll be strong
Whatever you do
Please don't get me rescued
'Cause I'm feeling like
I might need to be near you
And I feel alright
So please don't get me rescued

You are my signal fire...

Dyspnea...
tachycardia...
hypertension...
hyperventilation...

GOD I have stage on wednesday!!!

mind riddles

Honey trickling down with the golden light shining through its sliding layers.
Thick and viscous.

Orange brown like the sun shining through light brown eyes.

A glimpse of the mist inside the maze.
Tiny little smoke particles making random flickering shiny dots.
Sharp-edged sometime cause paper-cuts with deep reds oozing out.

The war which are lost and won.
Sorrows not sad enough.

Wrapped inside the heart-shaped boxes of remorse.
Shimmering patterns of lies on the covers.

Brown husky moths on the inside trapped.
Velvet purples of the evening pains flowing through silver pipes diamond-studded.

A white canvas with invisible colors.
Mind riddles.

locked in

It is tormenting like hell to harbor hate and love at the same time for a person in your heart.

Why do You like to place me at the breaking point,at the borderline always?
To tell You the truth
seriously I am losing my sanity and my soul at the cost of it so please stop this rollercoaster life for me!

shades..

Blink Blink

Here she sits and stares

Life has different colours

Emotions have shades too

Today I am a mix of purple and deep sea green

Maybe it’s beyond any understanding

Standing..air fluttering

A longing deep intense longing

Images in the rearview

Flashbacks

dark maroon color

And then the gray mist

Purpose

Miracle

Strings

Sky blue

What we all want is crystal clear clarity in everything

But relations they are always some kind of magic a mystery

Hard to interpret yet impossible to be without them

Dirty green

*deep breathe*

waiting for the day when she wins the battle against herself..